COG 83: Tone Deaf in a Family of Musicians

This article is written for the 83rd edition of the Carnival of Genealogy. The topic is musical instruments. Do you play a musical instrument or did one of your family members? What instrument did you or they play? If no one in the family played an instrument, tell what is your favorite instrument or band and what is your least favorite one. Hosted By Janet Iles who authors the blog, Janet the Researcher.

I'd like to think that I got all the good genes and none of the bad.

And then reality sinks in.......

The one thing I've always wanted was to be able to sing....and carry a tune while doing it. As it is, I should really only sing while driving or perhaps in the shower. But most especially I should be only singing while alone so as not to offend anyone else's delicate ears. The irony of this situation is that I am descended from many fine folks with musical talents. Apparently that gift did NOT get passed on to me.

Now this isn't to say that I haven't had some musical training. There was a year of piano lessons using the Suzuki method when I was in about the third grade and then there were the four years of clarinet in the school band (grades six through nine). By the time I finished ninth grade and was ready to transfer to the high school (I went to a three year high school), I decided that band was just not for me. I had no desire to march around the football field at halftime or be in the pep band for basketball games. The musical compositions were becoming more difficult and I was not keeping up to that skill level. And frankly I was having a hard time determining when I was sharp or flat. I knew if I was wildly off key but when it came to fine tuning I simply couldn't tell if I was off key. And so ended my not-so-illustrious musical career.

If I consider all the musical talent in my family, I'm almost embarassed by my own lack of skill. My maternal grandmother grew up in a small town in eastern South Dakota, so there were a lot of long cold winters with little activity. To counteract that they would have a house party of sorts. My great-grandparents each came from a family of 7 siblings, so there were many aunts and uncles on both the Hanson and Hiby sides who would gather with their instruments on a Saturday night and play to the wee hours. As a result, my grandma can play the piano by ear but she never really learned to read music. Her brother can play accordian and piano by ear. He still lives in this rural area of South Dakota and plays for a lot of senior citizen groups. I think he owns at least three pianos and nine different accordians.

If they weren't making music, they were listening to it usually by means of the Grand Ole Opry on the radio on Saturday nights. My grandma also remembers her dad driving the family into town one evening and parking on the street next to an auditorium or dance hall. It must have been summertime because the door to the building was opened and out poured the live music of Lawrence Welk. She even remembers catching a glimpse of him. As a child, I remember having to watch reruns of old Lawrence Welk shows which I found to be incredibly boring. The only thing I really enjoyed were the bubbles and the ladies' pretty dresses. Funny what you remember........

And obviously musical talent does run in my grandma's Hiby line (originally spelled Hoiby), because we are related to Lee Hoiby, famous American composer best known for his work on "Summer and Smoke" by Tennessee Williams. Another famous work he is well known for is Shakespeare's "The Tempest". While the Hoiby/Hiby line is Norwegian, Lee Hoiby's mother's line was Danish and apparently very musically talented.

On my paternal grandfather's side, the McNeills were known to have some musical talent. I previously have written about my great-grandfather, Charles McNeill, and his ability to make his own fiddles. I have long known of his talent and it never ceases to amaze me. I recently caught the tail end of a PBS program on the Queen Family of Jackson Co, North Carolina, which is southwest of Mitchell and Yancey counties where my McNeills are from. The Queen Family has a similar Scots-Irish background and are all very musically talented. I can only envision that perhaps my own McNeills, including my great-grandpa Charlie, may have had this type of talent for the old mountain songs and bluegrass.

Even my husband comes from some musical background, including his own stint in the high school band playing saxophone. His father used to sing in a barbershop quarter. His maternal grandfather, Chester Kosinski, played the trumpet in an orchestra and in the 1930 U.S. Census in Bloomfield, Essex Co, New Jersey he listed his occupation as an orchestra musician.

Alas, it appears that even with all this talent coming before me I am destined to sing off-key. But it hasn't deterred my own love of music.

Did I also mention I have two left feet?

My ancestors in the SSDI

I noticed a post on Rootdig.com that Michael John Neill had noted his ancestors that were listed in the SSDI. I thought this was an interesting exercise and certainly not one I had considered before, so here goes nothing.....

1. Fred Joseph Harmon (1 Jun 1921-25 Apr 1993) - my grandfather
2. Kate Harmon (5 Nov 1889-21 Sept 1974) - my great-grandmother and mother of #1, maiden name was Arthur
3. Helmer Hiby (21 Jan 1895- Jun 1982) - my great-grandfather
4. Bernice Hiby (27 Mar 1903 - 28 Mar 1982) - my great-grandmother, maiden name was Hanson
5. Charles McNeill (18 Feb 1886-12 May 1970) - my great-grandfather
6. Della McNeill (15 Mar 1893-1 Mar 1979) - my great-grandmother, maiden name was Grindstaff
7. Frona Scott (13 Jun 1890-29 Jun 1971) - my great-grandmother, maiden name was Greathouse

It should be noted that both my grandmothers are still living as well as my parents.

The other unusual thing is that my grandfather, Lee McNeill, should be listed in the SSDI. However, the reason he may not be listed is that he died at age 59 before he started receiving benefits so my grandmother may not have needed to report his death to the Social Security Administration. And she was admittedly rather shell-shocked. Her mother Frona died at the end of June and just over two weeks later Lee died suddenly from a heart attack. Frona had lived with my grandparents since her own husband, Bert Scott, had died in 1950 on the day my uncle was born.

This also pointed out a couple of flaws in my recordkeeping. I need to note the dates of my Hiby grandparents' passing. I remember both their funerals fairly well, particularly for my great-grandma Bernice. She either died on the 27th or 28th of March and the funeral was on the 31st, which was their wedding anniversary as well as my birthday. And my great-grandpa Helmer died just three short months later in June. However, that date escapes me completely. I will need to follow up on that.

Summertime in good ol' South Dakota

This post is for the 76th Edition of the Carnival of Genealogy: The Good Old Summertime.


My mother's family has strong ties to South Dakota. My mother was born in Watertown, Codington Co. My grandparents were born in Clark and Codington counties. Three of my four great-grandparents were born in South Dakota. In fact, most of their parents (my great, great-grandparents) came to Dakota Territory in the 1880s from places such as Rice Co., Minnesota, Dane Co., Wisconsin, Whiteside Co., Illinois and Houston Co., Minnesota.

My family took very few vacations when I was a child. I guess you could say we did a lot of "staycations" long before that even became a word. Who knew we were trend setters? However, there is one vacation I distinctly remember from the summer of 1981 when my mom, sister, and I joined my grandparents to drive for two (very long) days across two (very long) states to get to eastern South Dakota to visit our extended family. Bear in mind, I was six years old and we probably hadn't been on the road 50 miles before the infamous "Are we there yet?" began.

Since I was only six there are a few things I vaguely remember and others I don't recall at all. When I asked my mom last week for photos from that trip seeing them triggered some memories and brought up some wonderful stories. I remember seeing the old drilling rigs slowly pumping from the interstate in Wyoming. I remember my grandparents pointing out the antelope, which I thought for sure they called "cantaloupe". I was very confused about what the orangy colored fruit was doing in the middle of nowhere and what the big deal was about the "deer" out there. I vaguely remember stopping in the heat for a photo op at Independence Rock in Wyoming. Notice my protective arm around my younger sister.

Our first major stop was in the Black Hills to see Mount Rushmore. My grandpa Fred had a brother, Harry, and nephew and their families living in nearby Rapid City. Since we lived a couple of states apart and they didn't see each other often, I'm sure there was a visit though I don't recall it. I do however recall the pictures we took at Mount Rushmore. I also recall that my grandpa lost his lens cap to his camera over the edge at the viewing area. It also seems like we stayed in a campground in the Black Hills that had an evening program that was Native American dancing. It was quite impressive to see the feathered costumes, headdresses and fast moving feet of the performers.

Here I am in all my ruffled glory with my little sister and the four Presidents. I was 6 and she was about 3 1/2.

So our final destination was Clark County, South Dakota, specifically in the tiny town of Naples at my great-grandparents house. My grandma's parents, Helmer and Bernice (Hanson) Hiby, were in their mid-80s and late 70s, respectively, at this time. I had only had occasion to see them a couple of times and was really too young to remember any of them. I remember they had a beautiful old farmhouse with a big lawn and barn behind. There was a big enclosed porch on the front of the house at the front door that held lots of wonderful treasures, but everyone came in through the back door right into the kitchen. My great-grandma Bernice liked to sew and quilt. She had made a beautiful green quilt top that my mom loved and took notice of a few years prior to this trip. Mom asked if she could have it to quilt and she had it done by the time we took this vacation. We took several photos of the quilt hanging on the clothesline out behind the house. Here is one of me with my great-grandma Bernice and the beautiful quilt that holds a special place in our family.




My grandpa Fred's parents, Edward and Kate (Arthur) Harmon, had both passed on in 1960 and 1974, respectively. Their three sons, Ken, Harry of Rapid City, and my grandpa Fred, all lived elsewhere by this time and there wasn't really any family left living there. However, Edward and Kate's house in Henry, Codington Co., South Dakota was still there (and is still today) right on a corner of the little town. Here my sister and I are standing on the west side of the house. The upstairs window is a bedroom and the downstairs I believe is the living room. An enclosed porch with a door facing north can be seen on the left side of the photo. My mom recalls visiting this house as a child and staying in a makeshift bed on the upstairs landing. There my great-grandma Kate had a beautiful square (now antique) table with glass ball feet that was covered with books. My mom now has that beautiful table in her living room. Not only was my great-grandma a lover of books like me, but she was the family historian before there truly was such a thing in our family. Her handwritten notes gave me a start on our Harmon, Arthur, Struble and Myers lines.

In the yard of the Harmon house in Henry stands a wonderful tree with this interesting split trunk. Mom also captured us in front of the tree. Next door to the old house was a playground with an old metal slide and a wonderful merry-go-round that were reminiscent of the ones on my own school playground. After we took photos of the house, I remember playing on the merry-go-round and my grandpa Fred helping make it go faster.

This trip we took holds more significance than just the simple memories of a six-year old. This would be the last time my mom, sister or I would see my great-grandparents. Bernice passed away the following March 1982 and Helmer in June 1982. The next time my mom, sister and I went back to visit was with my grandma in 1995. My grandpa Fred had passed away two years earlier. Much has changed since then, but fond memories of this trip and the sweet childhood pictures my mother took of us as such little girls will always be a special treasure.

Photos held privately by author. Please do not use without permission.

My surnames being researched

Before I continue on with Lee's story, I feel compelled to give a brief description of the other surnames that I am researching. Though Lee's family was the impetus to get me started, I have since branched out to pursue my other grandparent's families as well. The list includes the following:



HARMON from Clark Co, South Dakota (1880s to 1960s); Whiteside Co, Illinois (1840s to 1880s); Berkshire Co, Massachusetts (? to 1840s). Lines related to the Harmons include ZIMMER, HEATH, and ARMSTRONG.



ARTHUR from Clark Co. and Moody Co., South Dakota (1870s to 1950s or so); Rice Co, Minnesota (1850s-1920s); Ashtabula Co. and Trumbull Co., Ohio (1840s-1850s); and New London Co, Connecticut (? to 1830s). Lines related to the Arthurs include BROWN (Ashtabula Co, Ohio), MYERS, STRUBLE (from Union Co, Pennsylvania) and COCHRAN (also originating from Union Co, Pennsylvania).



HIBY/HOIBY from Clark Co., South Dakota (1880s to present); Dane Co, Wisconsin (1860s to 1900s), and Norway. Also related is NELSON of Norwegian descent.



HANSON from Clark Co., South Dakota (1880s to 1960s); Winneshiek Co. and Buena Vista Co., Iowa, and Houston Co., Minnesota (1850s to 1880s); and Kongsvinger, Norway prior to 1850. ANDERSON is another related surname.



SCOTT from Johnson Co, Kansas; Furnas Co, Nebraska; Nodaway Co, Missouri, Davis Co, Iowa and Hendricks Co, Indiana; Associated surnames include PITTS, JONES, SHERER/SCHERER, and the mysterious SWIFT. There is great speculation and family lore indicating that a Scott was originally a Swift. It's a puzzle I'm still working on.



GREATHOUSE from Wright and Webster Co, Missouri (1860s-?) Greathouse branches also are in St. Clair county; Kentucky and Virginia (1790s-1830s). Associated surnames include JOHNSON, COX from Randolph Co, North Carolina (they were Quakers), and ALGOOD/ALLGOOD.